Renaissance Havanese

My sister Regina Sept 2 1974-April 14, 2004

My sister, my best friend had young life taken from her in 2004 when she was killed by what I refer to as a silent monster. A brain aneurysm took her life  in less than one week from her first symptom. She left behind her two children ages  4 and  11.  She is pictured here with her daughter.

Regina  had worked very hard and was close to graduating from Post University with a degree in Law Enforcement. She had a life long goal to continue her education and her greatest interest was to pursue a career as a Police Detective and ultimately a career in Forensic Science when she passed away. Her favorite symbol was the bald eagle, I think it symbolized more than her unwaivering patriotism but it was also representative of her emotional strength and her courage. To this day, her eagles stand on my mantle, a reminder of her leadership. She was brilliant, kind and had a great sense of humor.  Life will never be the same without her here.

When Regina was living she made the commitment to be an organ donor. I remember a poignant conversation we had at DMV when I accompanied her to renew her license. She made it clear that she thought it was irresponsible to throw away what you would no longer need if it meant that lives could be saved, and so, I had to make sure to see it through. It is the most difficult thing to discuss organ donation in the hospital when your loved one is still seemingly alive but the devastating memories fade a little with time, the gift of life goes on forever, for so many.

Our family has had the honor of hearing from some of Regina's donor recipients and the greatest honor is the relationship we share with one Connecticut family, who's father and husband Don is still here because of Regina's decision. Meet Don's children, here they were our guests of honor at the annual Donor family gathering hosted by Life Choice Donor Services.





Meet Don, the recipient of my sister's liver, and his wife Elsie




Don is retired and Elsie is a middle school teacher here in Connecticut Here they stand in font of memorial quilt, just above Don you will see a bald eagle in flight, this quilt square was lovingly made by Elsie, it reads forever Grateful  04-14-04, the date of Don's transplant, also the date
my sister left us.


In 2005 we met by accident when Don was asked by the ALF to attend a Donor family gathering to hand out certificates of appreciation to donor families. He along with other donor recipients, stood in line to wait for families to be called up. When families were called a photograph of their loved one was displayed on a screen. By a strange twist of fate, Don ended up being the one to hand the certificate to our family. He realized this when he matched the date of death with the date of his transplant. He was familiar with my sister's name because we had corresponded once through Lifechoice. Here is a photograph of Regina's daughter and I when we met Don for the first time.

We almost missed this opportunity as I struggled with the decision to attend, at the very last moment, I remembered that it wasn't just about me, I had to do it for her daughter.


This was one of the ways I chose to honor my sister.



My sister donated her organs, bones and corneas. The most amazing to me is that her corneas restored someone's sight. I had the opportunity to meet a man, a cornea recipient. He told us about how miraculous it was the first day he was able to see his wife's face again after twenty years of darkness and see for himself, finally, how his children had grown.

I'll never forget the twenty year old bone recipient either, she faced leg amputation in order save her life from an agressive bone cancer. The surgeons carved the piece of bone that she needed out of donor bone and it saved her life, she spoke to us about her accomplishments after her second chance.

These people are the most appreciative people you will ever meet, it is often difficult for them to tell their stories without emotion. They never forget that they live on because of the gift someone left behind. It is just amazing to meet these people who live their lives like it were their last day. What an inspiration.

Someday, I hope you get the chance, to live like you were dying... Tim McGraw

My Daughter Lexie led by our dear friend Don at the Football walk for Liver Wellness. We are invited every year by the DeToro family, who are very active with the ALF.  Lexie is walking one of our Havanese puppies, who accompanied us while waiting for her family.

M.Jodi Rell Governor of Connecticut with Don and I. April happens to be Organ Donation Awareness month. Don accompanied me to a press conference where the Governor discussed new changes that will make it easier for people to register as organ donors through our states DMV.

To be continued...